Curses across cultures

Curses across cultures

I had the benefit of growing up in a multi-lingual household. English is my first language, but both my parents speak Hebrew. My mom immigrated here in the 1970s. She dated my dad for two months, and he proposed. It was a weird time. They kinda knew each other, 

My parents primarily spoke Hebrew at home back then. My older brother, in fact, apparently knew zero English when he started nursery. That’s how fresh off the boat we were. 

Roll back one generation, and the language party gets even wilder. My mom heard an Iraqi/Judeo dialect between her parents, which sounds more Arabic than Hebrew.  

My dad’s parents, Flora and Adolf (didn’t see that one coming) spoke their native language of Hungarian, which is called Magyar. That’s ranked THE hardest language to learn, with lots of z’s where they shouldn’t be. My dad grew up in the 1950s Bronx, where they translated the Torah and Talmud into Yiddish. 

I’m fascinated at how some cultures invented words or phrases that perfectly describe an esoteric situation. Balagan (Hebrew) for a chaotic mess, ranging from a messy room to a political disaster like a war. Farblungent (Yiddish) when a person is lost, confused, or aimlessly wandering.

But this post is all about the most important words. The swear words. The curses. The elevated f-bombs that you never knew existed but needed.

To keep this focused, I’ll share some phrases from my background. Ones that take me back….way way back…..

Back to Budapest in the late 1800s…It’s cold as fuck on the family farm…Two blue-eyed Hungarian men in their seventies stand next to the cow. Portly with thick mustaches, they look a lot like plumbers. That’s my great-grandfather and his brother, milking the beast at sunrise. Things are going well…until my great-great uncle, wearing fingerless gloves, lets the bucket slip through his fingers. White nectar seeps into the ground, their morning mission a total failure.

“Faszfej!” yells Yonah.

And that was the first time anyone in Hungary shouted the word dickhead.

Let’s fucking go!

Hungarian/Magyar Curses

Magyar is the #1 hardest language to learn. Hard to pronounce words with lots of z’s where they shouldn’t be. Good luck pronouncing any of these. 

Elvarázsoltak?
Translation: Have you been bewitched?

When your friend got sucked into their phone mid-convo. And when your kids get possessed and need a fig bar. 

Káposztalé van az agyad helyén?
Translation: Is there sauerkraut juice where your brain should be?

When you’re talking to someone who gets their political news only from Instagram.

Kettéváglak!
Translation: I’ll cut you in half!

When that idiot goes in the wrong direction at the holiday buffet line.

Megőrülök!
Translation: I’m going insane!

When you’ve lived through 2023.

Iraqi/Hebrew Curses

These bombs from Baghdad are influenced by traditional Arabic curses from the Levant, and many made it into modern Hebrew.,  There’s a plethora of ‘Your mom’ or ‘Your dad’ style insults, with a twist of cancer or eye blindness. That said, here’s a range from light to dark.

In’aal Abook!
Translation: Your father’s shoe!

When you are mildly annoyed at someone but instead rag on their dad. Let’s face it - you’re probably just projecting.

Frier!
Translation: Sucker!

When you’re at Costco waiting in line for a food sample, and all the dumplings were taken because you were ever so patient. (The frier’ is a foundation of Israeli culture. The idea: in every exchange, you’re either the winner or the person getting screwed.)

Eze Psichi! Eze Metumtam!
Translation: What an imbecile! Such an idiot!

Not sure where this is from, but my mom says this a lot. Usually about Trump.

Ben Elef Zonot!
Translation: Son of a thousand whores!

When you’re on your bike and a car gets dangerously close to you. This one’s a true classic. It’s a bad one. The implication is that your enemy was born in a house of whoredom, and his true lineage is a total mystery.

ThuqutIunuk Eino!
Translation: May his eye burst!

When he takes his phone to the bathroom and disappears for thirty minutes.

Yiddish Curses

When Ashkenazi Jews cursed other Jews, they couldn’t rely on antisemetic tropes like ‘blood sucking baby killing vampire’ as that would be too expected and be too cruel. So they mixed it up with these cooler ones. Choose your favorite!

Yemach shmo!
Translation: May his name and his memory be blotted out!

When you speak of Hitler, Hadrian the Destroyer, or a high school bully. 

Khasene hobn zol er mit di malekh hamoves tokhter! 
Translation: He should marry the daughter of the Angel of Death!

When you want Salt ‘n Straw ice cream and the jerk in front of you taste eight flavors.

 Zol er krenken un gedenken!
Translation: Let him suffer and remember!

When a 16-year-old merges too slowly on the freeway and causes you to brake check and create a massive pileup.

Vi tsu derleb ikh im shoyn tsu bagrobn!
Translation: I should outlive him long enough to bury him!

When you’re at the gym and the skinny guy next to you squats both your body weight.

Lign in drerd un bakn beygl!
Translation: May you lie in the ground and bake bagels.

What it actually means? Please go die and may the heat of hell cook you into a crispy fried bread thing. Sounds nice?

4 Things Right Now

Watch: I am marathoning Blue Eye Samuari on Netflix. Animated action with a great storyline that is just truly great. Trailer link.

Watch: We are watching Fargo Season 5 with a heavy Jon Hamm and his pierced nipples.

Listen: “A Different Path Israel Could Take” – This episode of Ezra Klein and Nimrod Novik, an ex-military guy from Israel who is both hopeful and hopeless. Worth it.

Do: I deleted all social media apps from my phone (X and Instagram) and the impact is dramatic. More calm and ease. Less news and dopamine see-sawing. I’m missing nothing and regaining control of my time and day. Maybe worth a post next time.

Thanks for reading this! Send this to your favorite friend or enemy.

With love and curses,

Aaron.